Heidi Doheny Jay is an author, blogger, TV Host and published columnist who explores the mysteries of life, relationships and what makes men and women tick.
It’s not uncommon for some men to stay friends with their ex-girlfriends and often, their new or current girlfriend wonders why he would stay friends with his ex.
I think many women believe it’s for the purpose of either sex or just in case things don’t work out with the current woman, then he has someone to fall back on.
I was curious what men would tell me about this topic so I asked them:
Read MoreWhile most of us have heard the term Polygamy, think Mormons, far fewer have heard of Polyamory.
Polygamy is defined as many marriages, while Polyamory… many loves.
What’s the difference between having a girlfriend and having a sexual escapade on the side, and Polyamory? One is usually considered cheating due to the lying that takes place, and the other is being open, honest, accepting and communicating.
Read MoreWomen have forever scrutinized their bodies based on what’s considered hot in Hollywood or the news. American models have gone from an average size 8 to an emaciated size 0. Who drives this, I’m not sure, but the majority of men do not want a skinny woman who resembles Olive Oyl. They may like her sweet nature and the way she loves Popeye, but they don’t find her body type all that attractive.
Considering Marilyn Monroe wore a size 8-10 and is considered to be one of the sexiest women of all time, I believe most men find a slightly more voluptuous woman extremely attractive.
Confidence aside, average or voluptuous appears to be men’s favorite body type but the media would have women believe otherwise.
Some men argue that women actually struggle to be skinny to impress other women, not men. In the same way men try to impress their male friends, some women try to be the skinniest or the hottest of their friends. Why are we spending so much time and energy trying to be so darn skinny when most men don’t even care for that look?
Read MoreLast week I had the pleasure of attending a launch party for a new business at a venue in my neighborhood. My close friend sent me the invite saying, “You write about this kind of stuff so I thought you’d want to check it out.” I looked at the picture of the flyer in his text and immediately thought it was a great business idea; sex toys from a vending machine, The PinkBox Vending Machine.
Read MoreWhat does he want to know or understand about you?…… Everything!
There are few men who truly “get” women. It’s not necessarily their fault because women often don’t know why they do the things they do. Men wonder why women change their minds on a whim, how their moods can swing from being perfectly happy one minute, to irritated and somewhat sullen the next. Many wonder why women overanalyze everything, ruminate about the same thing for days and are amazed at how they can remember everything a man ever said.
Read MoreI must admit that when I asked this question of men, I assumed they’d all return the same answer of, “I just want a hot chick that’s not crazy.” I was pleasantly surprised to see men put so much thought into the ideal qualities they were looking for in a woman.
Consider that as of 2008, there were 3.3 billion men on this planet. Is it really possible that all 3.3 billion men want the same things in a woman?
I doubt it.
Read MoreThe Daily Mail.com.uk ran a study by Katy Winter in their October 20th, 2014 edition about the secrets to a happy marriage. They looked at over 2,000 couples married for at least 10 years and asked them to rank, in order of importance, their best advice for newlyweds.
Read More“Women would do well to make an effort not to change. There’s an old saying that I believe Albert Einstein said and it goes something like this: Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.” -A 49-year-old married professor from N. Dakota.
How eloquently his advice sums up one of the fundamental differences between men and women, especially when it comes to relationships.
Read MoreI’ve learned plenty from one failed marriage followed by three not so serious relationships. But I wondered if men share the belief that every relationship has something to teach us? And do they ever reflect on why their relationship ended?
Read MoreIt’s the age-old question; does he cheat just because he can, or because something’s missing from his relationship?
Not every man wants to cheat or will cheat. I believe that just because a man (or a woman for that matter) has the urge to cheat, doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll act on it.
Read MoreNot too long ago I was out with some old work colleagues and I met a (let’s just say much younger) man. We ended up talking for about 15 minutes and he asked me for my phone number.
I willingly gave it to him because I found him rather attractive. He was tall, interesting, in great shape and was a fire fighter; what woman doesn’t like a man whose job requires him to save lives.
Read More“What were we thinking?” says my friend in response to my asking him what he’s learned from his 15 year marriage, “We had it all when we were younger, had all the freedom in the world, and we chose to end it by getting married. It’s still fun and I’ve been happily married, but now I have to be patient and calm and more understanding and it’s just different now.”
The definition of marriage has changed over the years but essentially it has become a partnership between two people who choose to make that partnership legal.
Read MoreMany people believe they’ve experienced love at first sight and are certain of its existence, while others feel it’s simply rapture and lust disguised as love.
Anthropologist, Helen Fisher PhD discusses in her article, The Realities of Love at First Sight appearing in O, Oprah Magazine November 2009, how real the experience of love at first sight can be for both men and women. She explains the science of meeting someone new and how we go about sizing them up immediately.
Read MoreI believe that close male friends can add a wonderful perspective to a woman’s life and diversity to her friendships. But what happens if you find yourself having more than friendship feelings for one of those male friends.
Do men ever consider dating their close female friends and is it possible for them to see something more between the two of you?
Read MoreSomeone once asked me, “Do you think men ever get lonely?” My response at the time was, “It sure doesn’t seem like it.”
About eleven years ago I was going through a divorce and found myself feeling incredibly lonely. I knew that over time things would get better, but I always wondered if my ex-husband felt as lonely as I did.
Read MoreAs a single woman in my early 40’s, I’ve occasionally asked myself the question, “Should I go with the moment and sleep with him, or should I wait for the right time?”
And when exactly is the right time?
Read MoreAt various times in my life I’ve found myself sitting with my girlfriends, usually drinking a glass of wine, discussing what it is that makes a man decide to marry a particular woman.
Read MoreIn the hopes of uncovering some of the seemingly difficult differences between men and women I asked the question, “Underneath it all, what do men actually think and feel about their relationships with women, and what matters most to them? What do women most want to understand about men?”
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